25 Comments
User's avatar
Pat Myers's avatar

Not only did Gene and I have lots of entries to choose from, but we also heard from lots and lots of entrants, some of whom enter only (or almost only) the horse name contests each year, but years on end. And even though the amazing Jonathan Paul saw a full third of his submissions -- eight entries -- get ink, we'll also be congratulating FIFTY-FOUR other Losers this week.

Expand full comment
Cary's avatar

Lots of great entries - all my faves were Honorable Mentions this time. I don't know why exactly, but I laughed out loud at 'The Liceman Cometh'. Two other 'Mistress' entries also made me chuckle: HO and Mountee. Also chuckle-worthy: Raptcha. Three 'Donut God' offspring made my faves list, two of which were excellent musical shout-outs: Beignet & the Jet, Glazed Unconfused. Also Fire in the Hole just struck me funny. I'm an editor, so of course I liked the 'Garamond' entries, but in particular New Serif in Town and Baptismal Font get my vote. Three 'Guns Loaded' offspring got my thumbs up: Simon & Shoots Her, Gangsta Wrap, and No. 1 With a Bullet - so much cleverness! My favorite 'Luxor Cafe' entries among the many were Mummy of Invention and Fish and Cheops. And finally, I did have an 'Olive Green' fave, but it wasn't the winning entry, which I had to read several times before I got it; the one that got a giggle from me was Spinach Armada - bonus because it's not only silly, but historical! Anyway, all of the entries were cleverer than I could ever be, so congrats to all. Every year I marvel at the results of this contest!

Expand full comment
JefCon 1's avatar

So many goodies.

On Posting Day on Losernet, I had praised Alfred E. Newsman.

HO was also a favorite for sheer brevity and the double meaning in two letters.

Expand full comment
Pat Myers's avatar

HO was one entry that I predicted some people wouldn't get. I personally had Lionel HO trains as a child, but I doubt that many children of the past 50 years have. And back in my Neolithic youth, not many girls were acquainted with HO layouts unless their dads or brothers had them.

Expand full comment
Terri Smith's avatar

Yep we are the same age, and I didn’t get it. No trains in what my dad often referred to as the girls’ dormitory he lived in. (It was just my mom, my sister and me.)

Expand full comment
Lynne Larkin's avatar

Brother had a set and I was unbelievably jealous!

Expand full comment
Jim Schaefer's avatar

An also-ran that should have won, placed, or showed:

Garamond x Innovator = New Serif in Town (Andrew Rosenberg, Brooklyn, N.Y.)

Expand full comment
Pat Myers's avatar

In a previous contest, Brendan Beary turned that pun into a limerick:

The calligrapher gained his renown

And he turned his whole trade upside down

With a fancy new script

At which somebody quipped,

"Seems we've got a new serif in town!"

Expand full comment
Jon Gearhart's avatar

JefCon: My 2 favorites are:

Chunk of Gold x Rapture = Oregasm (Jeff Contompasis)

Citizen Bull x Naughty Rascal = Beef Strokin’ Off (Jeff Contompasis)

Expand full comment
Lynne Larkin's avatar

Ditto!

Expand full comment
Lynne Larkin's avatar

The Dork Lord made me snort-laugh!

Expand full comment
Dale of Green Gables's avatar

"Manhattan subway rider forces stranger sitting next to him into sex act"

--- Headline today (05-01) in the NY Daily News

For those of you who thought sex in the NYC subway system was um...dead and done...

Expand full comment
Jesse Rifkin's avatar

Several are written in such a way that the horses are listed in the *reverse* order of how they're referenced in the actual foal name? Two examples:

Passion Rules x Coal Battle = Carbon Dating

Luxor Cafe x Crab Daddy = Fish and Cheops

It would be funnier to list those (plus a few others) reversed, i.e. "Coal Battle x Passion Rules" and "Crab Daddy x Luxor Cafe."

Expand full comment
Pat Myers's avatar

Yeah, I agree that in general it's better to list the pairings in the order that the references appear in the foal. We did turn a few of the entries around.

Expand full comment
JefCon 1's avatar

This is why I generate N*(N-1) permutations of the candidate list and not (N/2)*(N-1) combinations.

Expand full comment
Sam Mertens's avatar

Foal is also an anagram for Olaf.

Expand full comment
Gene Weingarten's avatar

True.

Expand full comment
Dale of Green Gables's avatar

Also FO LA, often used by Northern Californians.

Expand full comment
Sasquatch's avatar

Too many g[0]od ones to name a clear winner, but I particularly appreciate The Liceman Cometh and Beef Strokin' Off. BTW, isn't that the punchline of a common joke?

I had written "god" instead of "good." I guess I should have mentioned Donut God.

Expand full comment
Dale of Green Gables's avatar

Believe you're referring to the one about the masturbating bull and stroganoff

Expand full comment
Sasquatch's avatar

Yep

Expand full comment
Dale of Green Gables's avatar

Looking forward to Foal Me Twice aka in loose translation from the Iroquois as "Sharp-Stick-in-the-Eye."

Expand full comment
Gregory Koch's avatar

Why is Donut God on the list of foals? He’s not a foal, he’s a sire.

Expand full comment
Pat Myers's avatar

That's fixed -- sorry about that. To make the list, to keep from typing in misspellings, I copied all the results into the Google doc, then erased the parents' names. Except for that stowaway Donut God. He's out now.

Expand full comment
Steve Geist's avatar

Surely this invalidates the results. Let's run it back!

Expand full comment