The best "horoscope" I know is the I Ching (book of changes) and really is philosophy and advice saved as fortune telling. And most good horoscopes follow that tradition and give advice disguised as something to do with the stars. In my opinion, of course. If Venus was really in the right house when you were born, I do think you are favored. or not.
I get annoyed every time I read "The headline [whatever] was submitted by [whomever]; [somebody] wrote the honorable-mentions subhead." Since you remind us what the headline is, why don't you do the same with the subhead? Why do we have to scroll back to see it?
The guy in Q&A who hoped to become a foundling for his 100 bucks has nothing on me. I forked over the big bucks assuming a fondling membership included more than snappy patter. Much more. Needless to say, I've been very disappointed.
"Now, I also reacted badly to the zombie runner in games that go into extra innings, but I admit I was wrong. It worked out fairly well. I am right about this."
I disagree. To me, it killed the one thing that made Baseball different than Football or Soccer. And it's probably what drove the huge popularity of youth soccer. There were no ties in baseball and games could go on seemingly forever. Even in youth leagues. And Soccer was over in an hour. A parent could drop off a kid at a soccer game and come back in an hour and the game was over. Easy-peasey to schedule a day around an hour soccer (or Pop Warner Football) game. Baseball was (and IS) an investment in time that modern day kids and parents don't want to make.
And it's by a First Offender! Congratulations, Heather Kennedy -- and let us know your street address so we can send you your Fir Stink for your First Ink (tinyurl.com/inv-firstink).
Or if I just put "Dripping Springs, Texas" on the envelope, will they just leave it by your hitching post?
And you'll also be getting, for the Loser Stats, a Loser Anagram (aka Granola Smear).
Think leaving his brass might actually be the exclamation point. Together the words on the shell casings are the title of a book "Delay, Deny, Defend: Why Insurance Companies Don't Pay Claims and What You Can Do About It."
Re horoscopes: The Washington Post at least once ran a correction because a horoscope was inadvertently published for the wrong day.
Seriously? That’s like trying to recall a fortune cookie for being incorrect.
The best "horoscope" I know is the I Ching (book of changes) and really is philosophy and advice saved as fortune telling. And most good horoscopes follow that tradition and give advice disguised as something to do with the stars. In my opinion, of course. If Venus was really in the right house when you were born, I do think you are favored. or not.
As the late Dikembe Mutombo might say, "Not in my house."
I literally LOL'ed at too many of these (and I'm sitting in my office by myself). One of the best Invitationals since the move. Well done, all!
I thought this one should have at least a top two...
Some people are ‘heart agers.’ Some are ‘brain youthers.’
And some are ‘noun verbers.’ (Duncan Stevens, Vienna, Va.)
Yes! Also 'Why are we in this river?', and:
Judy Freed's Vaginal goop (as it were).
I commented to Duncan, I thought were noun-adjectivers!
You beat me to this comment. I thought that one was the best of the bunch.
I get annoyed every time I read "The headline [whatever] was submitted by [whomever]; [somebody] wrote the honorable-mentions subhead." Since you remind us what the headline is, why don't you do the same with the subhead? Why do we have to scroll back to see it?
The guy in Q&A who hoped to become a foundling for his 100 bucks has nothing on me. I forked over the big bucks assuming a fondling membership included more than snappy patter. Much more. Needless to say, I've been very disappointed.
"Now, just resign on 1/10/2025 so we fuck up all the 47 merch because then Kamala is 47 and Trump is 48."
BRILLIANT!
And pardon Biden and smear the walls with ketchup (both the activity and the resulting product would be works of art) as mentioned in another comment.
"Now, I also reacted badly to the zombie runner in games that go into extra innings, but I admit I was wrong. It worked out fairly well. I am right about this."
I disagree. To me, it killed the one thing that made Baseball different than Football or Soccer. And it's probably what drove the huge popularity of youth soccer. There were no ties in baseball and games could go on seemingly forever. Even in youth leagues. And Soccer was over in an hour. A parent could drop off a kid at a soccer game and come back in an hour and the game was over. Easy-peasey to schedule a day around an hour soccer (or Pop Warner Football) game. Baseball was (and IS) an investment in time that modern day kids and parents don't want to make.
Gary Crockett must have been in a “duh” mood, I liked his eat less, voting booths and strong economy blinding glimpses of the obvious.
Oh my word, I laughed so hard at "’Why are we in this river?’ family asks"
Funniest invitational yet - so many excellent entries!
Dexter is extremely cute.
Style points for pointing the toes while extending the back leg. My gymnast daughter would approve.
And one of the best photographs.
This article about UnitedHealth ran in ProPublica just a couple of weeks ago: https://www.propublica.org/article/unitedhealth-mental-health-care-denied-illegal-algorithm
And here's another one from a year ago, in Ars Technica: https://arstechnica.com/health/2023/11/ai-with-90-error-rate-forces-elderly-out-of-rehab-nursing-homes-suit-claims/
My favorite was the bullet train HM.
And it's by a First Offender! Congratulations, Heather Kennedy -- and let us know your street address so we can send you your Fir Stink for your First Ink (tinyurl.com/inv-firstink).
Or if I just put "Dripping Springs, Texas" on the envelope, will they just leave it by your hitching post?
And you'll also be getting, for the Loser Stats, a Loser Anagram (aka Granola Smear).
Thank you!
I just emailed you, because our hitching post was stolen by some rustlers.
Santa in Wayne wins for me.
"Chimp bands may have humanlike culture, report finds
‘They’re usually an hour late for their gigs, and half of them are stoned,’ agent confides "
And if you give them a hard time, they throw their shit at you.
The shooter was amateur because he otherwise would have policed his brass.
Think leaving his brass might actually be the exclamation point. Together the words on the shell casings are the title of a book "Delay, Deny, Defend: Why Insurance Companies Don't Pay Claims and What You Can Do About It."
So many good entries this week! I especially liked the chimp band, why Eric is not in the cabinet, 800 mice, and Bark Social.