I do like surprises, excepting being sent to Vietnam, but this season is so much better than I expected. If things go as I hope to see, Democrats may get a landslide with a Congress to match an ambitious administration. Like when LBJ won and did the Kennedy agenda and marched it through Congress. Let us hope for a great year!
“Everyone knows the sofa gig is untrue, but the joke is that everyone looks at [Vance] and just KNOWS he is the kind of guy who would have sexual relations with a sofa.”
I would have said that applies equally, if not more, to Matt Gaetz.
Considering his recent asinine comments about Gov. Walz's military record and his, I think you could easily accuse Bierdo of stolen velour. No, please. One round of applause is more than sufficient. Very kind, I'm sure. But a donation to Invitational Anonymous would be appreciated.
I had an abrupt, shocking realization this morning. This is insanely naive, because I’ve been saying all along that I wouldn’t want to be president at my age (or at any age, actually), but the fact that Joe is my senior by 6 years blinded me to the fact that, compared to Harris / Walz / Vance, I AM in Joe’s cohort. ** Not one of those three was alive the day JFK was shot.**
Both Time and Old Man River just keep rolling’ along.
Wow, today's second-guessing poll is great validation.
Re: rhymes: I thought song lyrics were expected to have a looser rhyme standard than poems. In fact I think it was either Gene or Pat who told me that many, many years ago.
Also if there's even one person here who doesn't know this joke, that must be remedied:
A kid outside the Olympic track and field venue sees a man walk by carrying a very long stick. She asks, "Are you a pole vaulter?" and the man replies, "No, I'm German, and how did you know my name?"
For the Invitational, which is basically a cleverness contest -- and because the lyrics will be read, not listened to -- we want the lyrics to meet the standards of light verse, which values perfect rhymes. (We do become more flexible when someone records a video, though one with lax rhyming is unlikely to win the whole contest.) My minimum rule is that the parody must rhyme at least as well as the original -- i.e., if that song has interior rhyme, the parody should as well. It's why it's hard to parody really witty lyricists like Cole Porter or Tom Lehrer.
What I find particularly fascinating at the Games are the uniforms. The big Western countries have the designer duds, as expected. Some of the other larger national contingents, however, just couldn't be bothered. There's only a name, a flag and often, one different colored sleeve in what looks to be a grudging last minute design choice. This minimalist approach reaches it height with one or more of what I assume are newly discovered countries, using what appears to be pieces of hand-lettered duct tape strategically placed on off-the-shelf caps and tee shirts.
Excellent observation. During Reagan/Bush election, opposition was heard to say, after a hearty “REAGAN! BUSH!” cry, a snide response with a heavy whining sound, “Maaaahn-dale and Fuuuur-aaaaahr-ooooh!” Annoying but effective.
"Dukakis, which sounds alien and barbaric to a native English speaker, is the most notable.” During the run-up to the Michael Dukakis/George H.W. Bush election, I remember reading that Loretta Lynn said Dukakis's name was too confusing and she had to vote for the guy with the 4-letter name. I often wonder what she did during Bush/Gore. . .
The way things are going with the Olympics, they're going to have to add "Stranger" to the motto: "Faster," Higher," "Stronger." This year there's breaking or break dancing, sport climbing, skateboarding and surfing added to list. Thing is, I suppose the Games could reinstate tug-of-war, live pigeon shooting and solo synchronized swimming (how does that work?) but, clearly anything is fair game when it comes to an activity that gives the impression of an athletic endeavor. Team Spittooning comes to mind. Kind of a cornhole (the game...) but with loogies, not bean bags, and a spittoon or cuspidor placed at various distances. Think of it as competitive hawk tuah on steroids and in uniforms. Cornhole itself and maybe pickleball with actual pickles, having separate half-sour, dill and gherkin events. Can't have too many events. And I'd spice up the race walking competition (yes, it's still there) with a nod to Monty Python and funny race walk contests. Actually, considering the race walk technique, funnier race walk contests. Obviously, haven't even scratched the surface. Hey, there's another idea. Artistic scratching.
Ah yes, "Now in the pool from France are Béatrice and Bénédict performing their interpretation of Vermeer's 'Girl with the Pearl Earring.' Bénédict will be looking to repeat his acclaimed performance at the World Aquatics Championships as the pearl earring."
Wonder if the forgotten female writer of breakup songs mentioned in Q&A is Adele? Her "Someone Like You," of her overflowing oeuvre of heartbreak, has to be at the tippy top of the list. Then, of course, there is Dylan who, I submit, has to be number one on the male breakup song chart. Someone was always blowin' in the wind with the guy.
They probably didn’t get many. It’s a lot easier to take an existing line, and then run with it in whatever comedic direction you want, then it is to craft a setup so that the existing line, never meant to be funny, becomes so. At least in my opinion.
I do like surprises, excepting being sent to Vietnam, but this season is so much better than I expected. If things go as I hope to see, Democrats may get a landslide with a Congress to match an ambitious administration. Like when LBJ won and did the Kennedy agenda and marched it through Congress. Let us hope for a great year!
So much excitement!
My faves were Mark's winner, Frank's "grammatical construction" and "unadorb", and Michael's naughty star.
“Everyone knows the sofa gig is untrue, but the joke is that everyone looks at [Vance] and just KNOWS he is the kind of guy who would have sexual relations with a sofa.”
I would have said that applies equally, if not more, to Matt Gaetz.
Matt would go for underage couches.
High chairs
Loveseats.
Considering his recent asinine comments about Gov. Walz's military record and his, I think you could easily accuse Bierdo of stolen velour. No, please. One round of applause is more than sufficient. Very kind, I'm sure. But a donation to Invitational Anonymous would be appreciated.
“Feats, don’t phallus now.”
This is why we pay YOU for all the things.
Thank you. I got excited when I thought of it.
Then don’t go pole vaulting any time soon.
Hahahaha.
Love you, Gene, but that is a mental image I did not need at bedtime :)
No: Leg rhymes with plague only if you are Foghorn Leghorn.
About aging …
I had an abrupt, shocking realization this morning. This is insanely naive, because I’ve been saying all along that I wouldn’t want to be president at my age (or at any age, actually), but the fact that Joe is my senior by 6 years blinded me to the fact that, compared to Harris / Walz / Vance, I AM in Joe’s cohort. ** Not one of those three was alive the day JFK was shot.**
Both Time and Old Man River just keep rolling’ along.
Wow, today's second-guessing poll is great validation.
Re: rhymes: I thought song lyrics were expected to have a looser rhyme standard than poems. In fact I think it was either Gene or Pat who told me that many, many years ago.
Also if there's even one person here who doesn't know this joke, that must be remedied:
A kid outside the Olympic track and field venue sees a man walk by carrying a very long stick. She asks, "Are you a pole vaulter?" and the man replies, "No, I'm German, and how did you know my name?"
For the Invitational, which is basically a cleverness contest -- and because the lyrics will be read, not listened to -- we want the lyrics to meet the standards of light verse, which values perfect rhymes. (We do become more flexible when someone records a video, though one with lax rhyming is unlikely to win the whole contest.) My minimum rule is that the parody must rhyme at least as well as the original -- i.e., if that song has interior rhyme, the parody should as well. It's why it's hard to parody really witty lyricists like Cole Porter or Tom Lehrer.
What I find particularly fascinating at the Games are the uniforms. The big Western countries have the designer duds, as expected. Some of the other larger national contingents, however, just couldn't be bothered. There's only a name, a flag and often, one different colored sleeve in what looks to be a grudging last minute design choice. This minimalist approach reaches it height with one or more of what I assume are newly discovered countries, using what appears to be pieces of hand-lettered duct tape strategically placed on off-the-shelf caps and tee shirts.
I long ago arrived at the conclusion that shorter names would always win in American politics.
Because longer names tend to be non-wasp, unfamiliar, foreign-sounding (e.g. Dukakis) and thus unAmerican. Bush v. Gore was a tossup for good reason.
Harris chose well, for this among other reasons.
Excellent observation. During Reagan/Bush election, opposition was heard to say, after a hearty “REAGAN! BUSH!” cry, a snide response with a heavy whining sound, “Maaaahn-dale and Fuuuur-aaaaahr-ooooh!” Annoying but effective.
Latest aptonym for those in the DC area: Friday's post-game concert at Nationals Park is headlined by Teddy Swims.
Question: How does The Empress pronounce the word "water"?
"Wah-ter"
"Wer-ter"
Some other way
When my Philadelphia accent was fresher, it was like WAW-ter. Now it's still waw-ter but a little more -ah and a little less -aw.
Merriam-Webster's Unabridged dictionary says PLEG is a chiefly dialectal pronunciation of "plague."
"Dukakis, which sounds alien and barbaric to a native English speaker, is the most notable.” During the run-up to the Michael Dukakis/George H.W. Bush election, I remember reading that Loretta Lynn said Dukakis's name was too confusing and she had to vote for the guy with the 4-letter name. I often wonder what she did during Bush/Gore. . .
The way things are going with the Olympics, they're going to have to add "Stranger" to the motto: "Faster," Higher," "Stronger." This year there's breaking or break dancing, sport climbing, skateboarding and surfing added to list. Thing is, I suppose the Games could reinstate tug-of-war, live pigeon shooting and solo synchronized swimming (how does that work?) but, clearly anything is fair game when it comes to an activity that gives the impression of an athletic endeavor. Team Spittooning comes to mind. Kind of a cornhole (the game...) but with loogies, not bean bags, and a spittoon or cuspidor placed at various distances. Think of it as competitive hawk tuah on steroids and in uniforms. Cornhole itself and maybe pickleball with actual pickles, having separate half-sour, dill and gherkin events. Can't have too many events. And I'd spice up the race walking competition (yes, it's still there) with a nod to Monty Python and funny race walk contests. Actually, considering the race walk technique, funnier race walk contests. Obviously, haven't even scratched the surface. Hey, there's another idea. Artistic scratching.
"Sychronized swimming" refers to its being synchronized with music. However, the name of the event has been changed to "artistic swimming."
Ah yes, "Now in the pool from France are Béatrice and Bénédict performing their interpretation of Vermeer's 'Girl with the Pearl Earring.' Bénédict will be looking to repeat his acclaimed performance at the World Aquatics Championships as the pearl earring."
Artistic scratching is part of baseball tradition.
Yes indeedy. With baseball returning to the 2028 Games, there would be the possibility of ample scratch and whiff. What!? I don't make the rules here.
Wonder if the forgotten female writer of breakup songs mentioned in Q&A is Adele? Her "Someone Like You," of her overflowing oeuvre of heartbreak, has to be at the tippy top of the list. Then, of course, there is Dylan who, I submit, has to be number one on the male breakup song chart. Someone was always blowin' in the wind with the guy.
I like Jesse’s “Fortnight.” Interesting that you didn’t take any where Taylor’s was the second line.
Here are two inking entries in which Taylor's line is the second in the couplet.
You could fix (with some new zippers or other closures)
All your indecent exposures. (Beverley Sharp)
Dear aliens who abducted me to examine my poo,
They’ll say I’m nuts if I talk about the existence of you. (Jesse Frankovich)
They probably didn’t get many. It’s a lot easier to take an existing line, and then run with it in whatever comedic direction you want, then it is to craft a setup so that the existing line, never meant to be funny, becomes so. At least in my opinion.
You can probably guess I wrote a lot. Depends where the punch is. Ex: A bullet or shrapnel (not bonafide)/ “Now I seem to be scared to go outside”
Fair enough. I realized I was speaking strictly about my own experience in these couplet contests. They’re not my strong suit, anyway.
Apparently not mine, ever.😂