Re doctors offices and text to speech robocalls, my last name (I pronounce it “Kotch”, rhymes with “watch”) is frequently butchered by text to speech and robocalls, often in a way that is decidedly not safe for work. But at least it’s not as bad as what it does to my sister Leanne’s name. She’ll get robocalls from her doctors reminding her that “Lean Cock” has an upcoming appointment.
To people new to The Invitational: We used to run this information every week in the contest, but we cut it so the "fine print" doesn't go on too long. But there's a venerable and active social community for entrants and fans of the Invite (self-named the Loser Community, long story), with a 2000+-member Facebook group, weekly standings and a complete archive, and in-person brunches and parties around the year.
Sign up for the Style Invitational Devotees FB group at bit.ly/invdev (tell us that you came from The Gene Pool); see all the stats, archives, and coming events at the Losers' website, NRARS.org.
There are so many good entries this week: the references to Hitler (I like the time paradox the best), Rick Astley (Does this mean we got Rickrolled?), Vlad the Wedgie-Giver, Dopart's Trumpian take on the Emperor, the Jimi Hendrix mondegreen, and Robert Frost writing his name in the woods on a snowy evening. If I have to choose only one, it's the Robert Frost reference. By the way, there is a factual error in the entry on Captain Sully. The flight was to Charlotte, NC. Charlottesville doesn't have a runway long enough to land the plane.
I also noticed the airport error, but as a former ATC specialist who ran approaches into Charlottesville (CHO) I can attest that the runway is plenty long enough to land an A320. Taking back off however would require a less than full load, but I'm sure Sully could do the proper calculations.
Did you have an old copy of the Lampoon lying around? Did you remember it from when it originally appeared? I wasn’t aware of it, so I’m not guilty of plagiarism, though certainly capable of it. What if I had seen it in the Lampoon and submitted to the Invitational, but credited the Lampoon, as Gene has been doing with Grandfather jokes in Barney and Clyde?
Once was an accident. Twice? I'd say you're testing us, but I think you're REALLY making a witty allusion to the Invitational Context/Contest for Week 62. Even Pat the Perfect cannot run the results on March 14, 2 days before entries are due.
1) If you want "vice-like" to be banished in favor of the correct “vise-like,” then pronounce “vise" the way it’s spelled – to rhyme with “wise.”
2) I read the Robert Frost/"Stopping by woods" entry right after I finished today's NYT crossword puzzle, which (spoiler alert) has that poem as its theme.
It is one of the crappiest NYT Thursday puzzles ever. A terrible, terribly bad "poem," and not bad in a good way. A lame-brained theme. A supposedly "modern" poem that says nothing, modern or otherwise.
Are you referring to the Frost poem itself or to the NYT crossword? Could the bad quality of the crossword be due to Will Shortz being on medical leave?
Thanks for that. I've wondered about why Will was not doing the Sunday Puzzle, but I couldn't find anything online about it. Now I have. But Will did host one of the recent puzzles, and I thought his voice sounded weird, so I knew something must be wrong.
The poll at the end: I want to say that I did know the Churchill quote but didn't realize that Frank was referencing it in his joke. I didn't click the link until after I had read the poll and answered no.
Strange and perverse anxiety bred of initial shock, when I am now around newly-minted adults of the female persuasion in the family. Full bore swearing and especially f-bomb carpet bombing. I suppose now that many of George Carlin's "Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television" are being said --- and certainly on cable and in streaming --- I shouldn't be surprised, but it's still unsettling to hear a young woman of my long acquaintance (that would be from about fertilized egg) casually drop the f-word into conversation, several times. And not for shock value. It's become part of the vernacular. In fact, there are studies showing the the use of it among women has dramatically increased some phenomenal percentage over the past several decades, while men's use has dropped. Certainly "ladylike" language is more or less a thing of the past. But now, I find myself waiting a bit anxiously to get past the seemingly inevitable words you never used say in front of an older family member.
When our kids were little my wife and I both knew that any objectionable words from their mouths had most likely first been heard coming out of hers, not mine, and she’s at an age where - well okay let’s just call her a newly-minted adult of the female persuasion as well and move on.
Yes, the corresponding word for "avuncular," which means "like an uncle," is "materteral."
However, it's worth noting that "materteral" is not as commonly used as "avuncular," and you may not encounter it as frequently in everyday conversation or writing. Nonetheless, "materteral" is the appropriate term for describing qualities or behaviors that are characteristic of an aunt.
Regarding Superman II: I had a mad crush on the late Christopher Reeve, and I’ve seen that movie a bunch of times. The allusion is that he becomes human, has sex with Lois Lane (which, of course, is the reason for becoming human), and then is shocked that he can bleed. He gives up sex to become Superman again. An interesting addendum: A little girl in the theatre, who is now obviously at least in her forties, when she saw Clark Kent’s exposed chest in bed, shouted, “Look! He sleeps without clothes!”
Regarding “ about half of all marriages are failures and end in divorces.” This stat is generally derived by dividing the number of divorces in some period, say one year, by the number of marriages. Actually 75%-80% of all married folks are married to their original spouse. There is just a group of serial monogamists who enjoy paperwork and screw up the stats.
The Morse Code translation link does not work. It will not permit you to paste in the code from the Invitational entry. It also tries to get you to download an app. No, thanks.
I am getting thoroughly tired of the old-maidishness of my Kaspersky AV. I never know whether it's responsible for my being unable to access or fully load some pages or not. Lately WaPo pages with videos have been very slow to load, and this site loads the polls agonizingly slowly (after I've read the entire page).
Thank you for saving me from myself by correcting my entry and giving it ink. Minutes after posting it to LoserNet, Jeff Contompassis sent me a message reminding me that four score and seven years ago is in fact 87. I did know this but had what I can only call a brainfart when I typed the entry and never caught it on the numerous read-throughs last week.
Re doctors offices and text to speech robocalls, my last name (I pronounce it “Kotch”, rhymes with “watch”) is frequently butchered by text to speech and robocalls, often in a way that is decidedly not safe for work. But at least it’s not as bad as what it does to my sister Leanne’s name. She’ll get robocalls from her doctors reminding her that “Lean Cock” has an upcoming appointment.
To people new to The Invitational: We used to run this information every week in the contest, but we cut it so the "fine print" doesn't go on too long. But there's a venerable and active social community for entrants and fans of the Invite (self-named the Loser Community, long story), with a 2000+-member Facebook group, weekly standings and a complete archive, and in-person brunches and parties around the year.
Sign up for the Style Invitational Devotees FB group at bit.ly/invdev (tell us that you came from The Gene Pool); see all the stats, archives, and coming events at the Losers' website, NRARS.org.
Materteral is attested as referring to relationship between aunt and nephew/niece. Its use seems to be medical.
There are so many good entries this week: the references to Hitler (I like the time paradox the best), Rick Astley (Does this mean we got Rickrolled?), Vlad the Wedgie-Giver, Dopart's Trumpian take on the Emperor, the Jimi Hendrix mondegreen, and Robert Frost writing his name in the woods on a snowy evening. If I have to choose only one, it's the Robert Frost reference. By the way, there is a factual error in the entry on Captain Sully. The flight was to Charlotte, NC. Charlottesville doesn't have a runway long enough to land the plane.
We're going to go ahead and fix that. Thank you!
I also noticed the airport error, but as a former ATC specialist who ran approaches into Charlottesville (CHO) I can attest that the runway is plenty long enough to land an A320. Taking back off however would require a less than full load, but I'm sure Sully could do the proper calculations.
Thanks.
Only the last two lines of the entry are mine. Pat made it better by inserting the first line about the long trip into the forest in the sleigh.
From an old National Lampoon (letters from the editors):
Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here,
To sign my name in yellow snow.
Did you have an old copy of the Lampoon lying around? Did you remember it from when it originally appeared? I wasn’t aware of it, so I’m not guilty of plagiarism, though certainly capable of it. What if I had seen it in the Lampoon and submitted to the Invitational, but credited the Lampoon, as Gene has been doing with Grandfather jokes in Barney and Clyde?
Once was an accident. Twice? I'd say you're testing us, but I think you're REALLY making a witty allusion to the Invitational Context/Contest for Week 62. Even Pat the Perfect cannot run the results on March 14, 2 days before entries are due.
In light of this week's contest, we wanted to induce anxiety in you. Fixed.
At least this time we didn't give a wrong date for the entry deadline!
We may now just have to go with "Pat the Past Perfect" No really --- too kind. A single, heartfelt huzzah would have been sufficient.
That actually makes it better.
Yup. We just look sloppy and confusing; we're not actually failing to give you information a contestant really needs.
1) If you want "vice-like" to be banished in favor of the correct “vise-like,” then pronounce “vise" the way it’s spelled – to rhyme with “wise.”
2) I read the Robert Frost/"Stopping by woods" entry right after I finished today's NYT crossword puzzle, which (spoiler alert) has that poem as its theme.
It is one of the crappiest NYT Thursday puzzles ever. A terrible, terribly bad "poem," and not bad in a good way. A lame-brained theme. A supposedly "modern" poem that says nothing, modern or otherwise.
Are you referring to the Frost poem itself or to the NYT crossword? Could the bad quality of the crossword be due to Will Shortz being on medical leave?
Thanks for that. I've wondered about why Will was not doing the Sunday Puzzle, but I couldn't find anything online about it. Now I have. But Will did host one of the recent puzzles, and I thought his voice sounded weird, so I knew something must be wrong.
He suffered a stroke several weeks ago.
As I said, I had discovered that. I immediately googled for "will shortz medical leave" and found https://www.npr.org/2024/03/03/1235697837/npr-puzzlemaster-will-shortz-stroke, which cleared this up. But I still think I heard him (weirdly) a week or two ago.
Putting in a vote/LOL for Tim Livengood's entry, about baby Adolph.
Absolutely!
Kevin Dopart's "Big, beautiful wall" is my winner.
Extra credit for getting me to laugh at that joke in 2024.
The poll at the end: I want to say that I did know the Churchill quote but didn't realize that Frank was referencing it in his joke. I didn't click the link until after I had read the poll and answered no.
Same here!
Strange and perverse anxiety bred of initial shock, when I am now around newly-minted adults of the female persuasion in the family. Full bore swearing and especially f-bomb carpet bombing. I suppose now that many of George Carlin's "Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television" are being said --- and certainly on cable and in streaming --- I shouldn't be surprised, but it's still unsettling to hear a young woman of my long acquaintance (that would be from about fertilized egg) casually drop the f-word into conversation, several times. And not for shock value. It's become part of the vernacular. In fact, there are studies showing the the use of it among women has dramatically increased some phenomenal percentage over the past several decades, while men's use has dropped. Certainly "ladylike" language is more or less a thing of the past. But now, I find myself waiting a bit anxiously to get past the seemingly inevitable words you never used say in front of an older family member.
My wife has often said, quite accurately, that her use of the f-word has escalated dramatically since Trump entered national politics.
When our kids were little my wife and I both knew that any objectionable words from their mouths had most likely first been heard coming out of hers, not mine, and she’s at an age where - well okay let’s just call her a newly-minted adult of the female persuasion as well and move on.
Yes, the corresponding word for "avuncular," which means "like an uncle," is "materteral."
However, it's worth noting that "materteral" is not as commonly used as "avuncular," and you may not encounter it as frequently in everyday conversation or writing. Nonetheless, "materteral" is the appropriate term for describing qualities or behaviors that are characteristic of an aunt.
Regarding Superman II: I had a mad crush on the late Christopher Reeve, and I’ve seen that movie a bunch of times. The allusion is that he becomes human, has sex with Lois Lane (which, of course, is the reason for becoming human), and then is shocked that he can bleed. He gives up sex to become Superman again. An interesting addendum: A little girl in the theatre, who is now obviously at least in her forties, when she saw Clark Kent’s exposed chest in bed, shouted, “Look! He sleeps without clothes!”
I can't watch those Superman movies anymore. They make me too sad, after Reeve's horrible accident and eventual early death.
Regarding “ about half of all marriages are failures and end in divorces.” This stat is generally derived by dividing the number of divorces in some period, say one year, by the number of marriages. Actually 75%-80% of all married folks are married to their original spouse. There is just a group of serial monogamists who enjoy paperwork and screw up the stats.
The Morse Code translation link does not work. It will not permit you to paste in the code from the Invitational entry. It also tries to get you to download an app. No, thanks.
Worked for me, FWIW -
"TESTING, TESTING. I HAVE THREE NIPPLES, AND I'M STILL A VIRGIN. HAHA. NO ONE WILL EVER BE ABLE TO READ THIS."
Thank you for translating. It may be that my browser is locked down so much that I lose functionality in some websites.
I am getting thoroughly tired of the old-maidishness of my Kaspersky AV. I never know whether it's responsible for my being unable to access or fully load some pages or not. Lately WaPo pages with videos have been very slow to load, and this site loads the polls agonizingly slowly (after I've read the entire page).
I'm running Shit...errrr.....Bit Defender, and it ain't much better.
Thank you for saving me from myself by correcting my entry and giving it ink. Minutes after posting it to LoserNet, Jeff Contompassis sent me a message reminding me that four score and seven years ago is in fact 87. I did know this but had what I can only call a brainfart when I typed the entry and never caught it on the numerous read-throughs last week.
The Jimi Hendrix one beats all the original ones