> From the start the goal was to slightly lose, so you didn’t get the awful first prize.
There is a very good joke on this topic (translating from Russian) - a wife is accusing her husband on what a blockhead he is. Listing his inadequacies she finishes with "If there was a worldwide Olympics of blockheads, you would take the second place". Husband asks "Why wouldn't I take the first place" Wife "Because, you are such a blockhead!"
For those thinking about submitting a caption for the uh...compelling...image G (Week 6 Invitational), there is some interesting history to it. The original image (see link) has been cropped of several major elements for its use in the Invitational, including a German idiomatic inscription. Should also point out as a public service -- depending on Pat's and Gene's mood come judging time -- while they may allow something along the lines of "Cat got your ____?" in keeping with the New Age of Enlightenment here, as sticklers for accuracy, they may instead only accept a reference to a ferret, which the animal could very well be --- based on that history. As benevolent rulers, however, they may permit both. We must wait for the edict.
Just for the record, Gene - The "contact lens solution" entry did, indeed, have nothing to do with genitalia. Pat got it right! No pussies to be found - only contact lens cleaner.
My sister was born in 1987. We lived in Montana, which was an extremely white state. When she was about 2 and we did see a black person in town, she would light up and say "COSBY SHOW!"
Jeffrey C.'s Buckley "question" got me thinking what a cryin' shame it is that SI didn't exist in Buckley's heyday. My favorite Buckley memory was penned by himself, about Pat and him arriving as usual for Sunday Mass at St. Patrick's Cathedral. It turned out to be the day of the first ever "Folk Mass" held there. Let's just say Bill and Pat were not the "Kumbaya" type, in squirming detail.
The litigation attorney's question reminded me of my favorite moment from my bar review course back in the last millennium. It was during the Criminal Procedure section taught by the late great Charles Whitebread (who was nothing of the sort although he was White), a law professor, who told the following anecdote as an illustration of how your parents never really understand what you do for a living. When the defendant/successful appellant of the landmark U.S. v. Miranda -- a mentally unbalanced admitted murderer whose name is nevertheless known to millions due to police procedurals of the last 50 years -- died in a bar fight after his release from prison, Prof. Whitebread's mother sent him a clipping from a newspaper story about the death with the following inscription: "Dear Charles -- what a pity, after all he did for all of us."
My husband got his skin color from his Scotch -Irish mother. His sister got hers from their Italian father. Their maternal grandmother was always washing his sister because she looked dirty. I understand your reaction! On the other hand when my daughter was in pre-school she distinguished the two Rachels in her class as the brown Rachel and the white Rachel and I didn't worry about it because it was just her way of telling them apart. Like when she was 3 and announced she knew the difference between boys and girls: "Boys wear blue and girls wear pink!" I was expecting something else as I figured she'd seen a few diaper changes there at her day care.
Chris Doyle's question about the selfie with a water buffalo reminded me of a true story. When I was first out of college and working evenings I volunteered at the zoo in Syracuse. The lady who helped publish the zoo's newsletter asked me to take a photo of the new baby bison for the newsletter since I usually brought my camera with me to the zoo and had taken a photography class in college. I was allowed to go into the large enclosure where the bison were. However the bison mom did not like me getting close to her baby (I didn't have a telephoto lens) and luckily I managed to get back through the gate before she did. Probably beat my 50 yard dash record.
Also loved Chris' Doyle water buffalo entry. Back in the last century, I had occasion to spend a week in Victoria Falls, Zimbabwe. Also back in the last century, a dive/biker bar "Whitey's" was an Arlington VA institution. Whitey's had a "travel wall" on the way to the rest rooms where they would post worthy photos of patrons wearing a Whitey's T-shirt. I was determined to get my photo with an elephant during my Zimbabwe trip in order to be enshrined on the wall. At a very bare boned safari park (like no guides, just a map pre GPS and a stern warning to never ever get out of the vehicle), my friend & I set off in our rented Jeep. LO & behold at a water hole well past a stand of trees, there was a whole friction' herd of elephants! Like almost a hundred! Perfect! We'll just get out of the car for a minute, get my picture wth the elephants off in the distance and be off. In the course of taking my picture, my friend goes pale and says in a measured tone, don't turn around and walk very S.L.O.W.L.Y towards the car and get in. Puzzled, but respecting his extensive African experience, I do so. As we both get in the car, he does his best impression of a getaway driver from a bank heist as 4 juvenile (but still really big) pissed off male elephants come stomping and trumpeting out of the trees to make sure we were leaving. THEN, my friend mentions that these teen elephant gangs are known to patrol the perimeter to guard the herd. Still a great photo and we didn't get trampled ;-) Somehow we neglected to mention this when we checked out of the park ...
And here I was thinking No. 3 would be more in the manner of the classic shart. Ah well ---that's why you won two Pulitzers and I'm reduced to writing inane comments online.
Speaking of third base. As no doubt an "old school" baseball fan, I hate to break the recent news to you but in yet another effort to speed up the game, there will no longer be a third base, starting with the 2024 season. Players will have to run from second, across the pitcher's mound, directly to home. This is not only being touted as speeding up play, but adding the very real possibility of exciting physical contact. "Taking a pitcher out" would no longer be the manager's sole prerogative.
> From the start the goal was to slightly lose, so you didn’t get the awful first prize.
There is a very good joke on this topic (translating from Russian) - a wife is accusing her husband on what a blockhead he is. Listing his inadequacies she finishes with "If there was a worldwide Olympics of blockheads, you would take the second place". Husband asks "Why wouldn't I take the first place" Wife "Because, you are such a blockhead!"
For those thinking about submitting a caption for the uh...compelling...image G (Week 6 Invitational), there is some interesting history to it. The original image (see link) has been cropped of several major elements for its use in the Invitational, including a German idiomatic inscription. Should also point out as a public service -- depending on Pat's and Gene's mood come judging time -- while they may allow something along the lines of "Cat got your ____?" in keeping with the New Age of Enlightenment here, as sticklers for accuracy, they may instead only accept a reference to a ferret, which the animal could very well be --- based on that history. As benevolent rulers, however, they may permit both. We must wait for the edict.
https://vulgarcrowd.files.wordpress.com/2015/10/yh3mfhh.jpg?w=1024
Just for the record, Gene - The "contact lens solution" entry did, indeed, have nothing to do with genitalia. Pat got it right! No pussies to be found - only contact lens cleaner.
I am going to reflexively presume that the redacted name was "Anderson Cooper."
My sister was born in 1987. We lived in Montana, which was an extremely white state. When she was about 2 and we did see a black person in town, she would light up and say "COSBY SHOW!"
Again comrades --- not wanting to deprive you of royally rejected gems from the proletariat I offer (citations on request):
A: Are the French just lazy ?
Q: Why is English not the national language of France ?
A: ...a new term is trending: "sushi tero," short for sushi terrorism.
Q: What are critics in Japan calling the practice of providing only one chopstick in experimental Tokyo sushi restaurants ?
A: Police found the monkeys in a closet.
Q: What is proof that monkeys have only a vague understanding of human sexuality ?
In the Style Invitational Devotees group, Losers often share their "noinks" (as in no ink). Join at on.fb.me/invdev.
Sorry Pat --- as Groucho said (more or less): "I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member."
Jeffrey C.'s Buckley "question" got me thinking what a cryin' shame it is that SI didn't exist in Buckley's heyday. My favorite Buckley memory was penned by himself, about Pat and him arriving as usual for Sunday Mass at St. Patrick's Cathedral. It turned out to be the day of the first ever "Folk Mass" held there. Let's just say Bill and Pat were not the "Kumbaya" type, in squirming detail.
The litigation attorney's question reminded me of my favorite moment from my bar review course back in the last millennium. It was during the Criminal Procedure section taught by the late great Charles Whitebread (who was nothing of the sort although he was White), a law professor, who told the following anecdote as an illustration of how your parents never really understand what you do for a living. When the defendant/successful appellant of the landmark U.S. v. Miranda -- a mentally unbalanced admitted murderer whose name is nevertheless known to millions due to police procedurals of the last 50 years -- died in a bar fight after his release from prison, Prof. Whitebread's mother sent him a clipping from a newspaper story about the death with the following inscription: "Dear Charles -- what a pity, after all he did for all of us."
Ha, Pat and Gene discussing sex toys.
Kakistocracy would make a great word in the game of Balderdash.
Are you concerned that America may be suffering from a balloon gap that may allow the Chinese to breed more prodigiously than we do?
My husband got his skin color from his Scotch -Irish mother. His sister got hers from their Italian father. Their maternal grandmother was always washing his sister because she looked dirty. I understand your reaction! On the other hand when my daughter was in pre-school she distinguished the two Rachels in her class as the brown Rachel and the white Rachel and I didn't worry about it because it was just her way of telling them apart. Like when she was 3 and announced she knew the difference between boys and girls: "Boys wear blue and girls wear pink!" I was expecting something else as I figured she'd seen a few diaper changes there at her day care.
Gene: Also, after painful surgery I was briefly taking Ambien to get sleep through the pain. It made me insane.
I take Ambien regularly. I guess that accounts for it....
Chris Doyle's question about the selfie with a water buffalo reminded me of a true story. When I was first out of college and working evenings I volunteered at the zoo in Syracuse. The lady who helped publish the zoo's newsletter asked me to take a photo of the new baby bison for the newsletter since I usually brought my camera with me to the zoo and had taken a photography class in college. I was allowed to go into the large enclosure where the bison were. However the bison mom did not like me getting close to her baby (I didn't have a telephoto lens) and luckily I managed to get back through the gate before she did. Probably beat my 50 yard dash record.
Also loved Chris' Doyle water buffalo entry. Back in the last century, I had occasion to spend a week in Victoria Falls, Zimbabwe. Also back in the last century, a dive/biker bar "Whitey's" was an Arlington VA institution. Whitey's had a "travel wall" on the way to the rest rooms where they would post worthy photos of patrons wearing a Whitey's T-shirt. I was determined to get my photo with an elephant during my Zimbabwe trip in order to be enshrined on the wall. At a very bare boned safari park (like no guides, just a map pre GPS and a stern warning to never ever get out of the vehicle), my friend & I set off in our rented Jeep. LO & behold at a water hole well past a stand of trees, there was a whole friction' herd of elephants! Like almost a hundred! Perfect! We'll just get out of the car for a minute, get my picture wth the elephants off in the distance and be off. In the course of taking my picture, my friend goes pale and says in a measured tone, don't turn around and walk very S.L.O.W.L.Y towards the car and get in. Puzzled, but respecting his extensive African experience, I do so. As we both get in the car, he does his best impression of a getaway driver from a bank heist as 4 juvenile (but still really big) pissed off male elephants come stomping and trumpeting out of the trees to make sure we were leaving. THEN, my friend mentions that these teen elephant gangs are known to patrol the perimeter to guard the herd. Still a great photo and we didn't get trampled ;-) Somehow we neglected to mention this when we checked out of the park ...
Worth a mention "SpaceX President Gwynne Shotwell announced ..."
Expect the best.
Excellent.
How fitting that my poop joke got a #2RU. Thank you for making it more gratifying!
HAHAHAH. I must admit that I didn't think of that.
I once had a long debate about what a Number Three is. The results were evenly divide between vomit and orgasm.
Number 3 is spraying milk from your nose while laughing.
I don't know what a Number 3 is, but I do know what a Number 6 is. And the Number 6 Dance later on.
And here I was thinking No. 3 would be more in the manner of the classic shart. Ah well ---that's why you won two Pulitzers and I'm reduced to writing inane comments online.
Also there was a similar debate about what Third Base was.
Graig Nettles.
Speaking of third base. As no doubt an "old school" baseball fan, I hate to break the recent news to you but in yet another effort to speed up the game, there will no longer be a third base, starting with the 2024 season. Players will have to run from second, across the pitcher's mound, directly to home. This is not only being touted as speeding up play, but adding the very real possibility of exciting physical contact. "Taking a pitcher out" would no longer be the manager's sole prerogative.