He is Going Down Fast
But how fast is he going?
His approval ratings are tanking like an MI Abrams-class armored vehicle that’s been dropped by a helicopter into a swimming pool.
He is going down faster than a Reddit post about recent micro-fluctuations in Canada’s Gross Domestic Product.
He is going down faster than a hooker with an overdue gambling debt to Guido.
He is going down faster than a shot of Bulleit bourbon on the battlefield.
He is going down faster than a Mini-Mite Ultralight® jig lure with an unwisely selected five-pound Fish Razr® pyramid lead sinker.
He is going down faster than a giraffe’s mid-walk marble turds in the Serengeti.
He is going down faster than a Russian oligarch from a 12th-floor window.
He is going down faster than a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest.
He is going down faster than my dignity right now.
—
Okay, sorry. It looks very much like Trump is going down and it is hard not to get geeked out about it. It’s not just his godawful, subhuman, spit-flecked lunatic post about Rob Reiner, though that has clearly galvanized the parade of proverbial rats deserting a stinking shit. His approval ratings were in the toilet even before that.
The man seems to be losing on every front: Respect, self-control, elections, support, influence, sanity.
I don’t have much more to say right now. This might all be a delusion, an irrational exuberance, a fatal dose of wishful thinking. But I do think the zeitgeist is doing that tectonic zeitgeist thing it does every once in a while. We’ll see.
After a very brief pause to pathetically beg for money…
… and a very brief Gene Pool Gene Poll …
… We’re going to have a brief glance at the mailbag, and then be gone:
Q: You never talk about movies. Do you have an all-time favorite comedy, and if so, which? And why?
A: I do. Dr Strangelove. Second place, whatever that might be, is a long way down. Because it is a movie that is both spectacularly, relentlessly funny, and one that has a devastating social message.
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Q: You asked for spooky things in one’s lives. In the closing years of the last century, my niece was killed in a car accident, along with a friend of hers in the same car. A couple of years later my brother and his wife adopted a baby girl, as did the parents of my niece’s friend. My adopted niece has the same birthday as me; the other adopted girl has the same birthday as my wife.
A: Coincidence is always a little spooky. Sometimes really spooky.
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Q: Your reader’s story about the woman who used “colitis” to mean “coitus” in a college paper reminded me of a Jr. High Biology paper on vaccines that I wrote. I was a sheltered kid to whom reading Danielle Steel novels was risque.
Throughout the paper I used the word orgasms instead of organisms, and because I thought orgasms sounded so very much more educated than germs, or viruses, I used it quite a lot.
Even THAT dumbass kid back then was more qualified for Secretary of Health and Human Services than RFK Jr. will ever be.
A: Thank you. I once edited a story in which the writer referred to a 1960s dog puppet, who was a pitchman for commercials for Nestle’s chocolate. The writer said the dog’s name was “Fartful.”
Being older, I remembered the name: Farfel.
I fixed it.
—
Okay, we’re done here. See you all soon.
My reason for not being more optimistic is that the more desperate he becomes, the more likely he is to take the rest of us with him. He's not just a danger to himself, but to civilization.
I cannot feel any bit of optimism, as his approval rating has been going down for some time now, and nothing has changed.