Going Out With a Bang
This morning, I fired up my computer and saw some photos of how Donald Trump has redecorated the Oval Office so it looks like the sitting-room of a 19th-century Parisian bordello. Then I read that Trump had ordered Marjorie Taylor Greene to shut up about releasing the Epstein files because if they were released “my friends will get hurt,” and also that a blue-black bruise has now appeared on Trump’s left hand, to join the one on the right, the symptom that Trump said was caused by shaking too many hands and certainly not that he is terminally ill from fat and bile and a lifetime of licentiousness and wanton corn-syrup and ketchup abuse.
Then I went to get breakfast for Lexi. It was a can of dog food, the one above. The pop-top came off in my hand, with the lid still sealed tighter than Ghislaine Maxwell. So I grabbed a can opener, but it didn’t work because the lid was recessed because it was built to be popped off, not box-cuttered into, so I grabbed the nearest penetrating tool I could find, a garden claw, and hacked away at the can, and when that didn’t work I got a butcher knife and tried to carve my way into it and when that didn’t work I grabbed a fucking hammer and hammered in the top, and chopped chicken dinner exploded all over and I hate Donald Trump.
The man impels fury. He is turning us into pent-up, insensate savage beasts.
So.
I just want to say this to Mr. Trump. You know how you were stonewalling on the Epstein files because their release would “hurt your friends”? Well, I have good news for you! You can relax and just send those hundreds of thousands of new pages out without a care in the world! Why? Because you have no friends. Everyone else knows that but you, because it takes a friend to tell a friend he has no friends.
Got it?
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That’s almost all for today. I do want to direct your attention to the life story of this man, whose name may be the greatest inaptonym of all time.
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Today’s Gene Pool Gene Poll:
Please note these four photoshopped pictures of Donald Trump, captioned A-D.
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Do you have any extra money left at the end of the year? Really? Please consider The Gene Pool. Your subscription is probably tax deductible but don’t tell the IRS I said that, okay?
Could not answer the poll, as none seem at all funny. Sad, freaky, maybe, but funny -no. One day we will look back on this man the way we now look back on Joseph McCarthy, and on the present treatment of immigrants the way we look back on the treatment of Japanese Americans during WWII; i.e., with great shame.
What is Photoshopped in C?