Gene, I just love you. This sounds like something that would happen to me. I have been to lots of hospitals in the area for lots of reasons. Keep sharing your thoughts and symptoms!
I have that pogo-stick blood pressure perpetually due to a condition called autonomic dysreflexia as a result of a spinal cord issue. I wonder if nerve damage like you have suffered can have a similar effect? You can't "feel" the pain in your 👂in a normal way anymore so your body is "telling" you it hurts in a different way?
Also, that pooping thing you speak of. I was in the hospital only 2 days (Monday 12th & Tuesday 13th) but didn't poop until the following Sunday (the day of your surgery, the 18th?) when home health gave me a good old-fashioned soap suds enema. anesthesia slows EVERYTHING down in your system, so this is a common thing following surgeries. Most hospitals won't let you leave following in-patient surgery until you fart.
Oh, I forgot the bigger mistake you might want to look for in your hospital notes; a mistake, or not, written, about your behavior. I was told to prepare to go to rehab for 2 weeks. I was planning, without pleasure, to be away from my home 2 1/2 hours away. Bags pack with a bit of "spirits" for my confinement. Could be I was confused with another patient who couldn't walk the halls unassisted the day after surgery. Next day, too my delight but a bit confused, I was discharged and was home the day before Thanksgiving. I was very pleased, and at my first stop purchased throat lozenges since no one in the hospital paid any attention to my complaint. *see the next note. Much to my dismay even though not complaining about anything, the hospital nurse's note read, "Difficult patient who didn't want to go home." Maybe I should be pleased that it wasn't a more serious mistake like in my medicine dosage. Besides who would believe that someone would not want to leave that crazy place!?
The first clue, had you not been under the influence at the time, was when they wheeled you into the "Jeffrey Dahmer Surgical Suite." Great comedians those Jesuits.
The sides of our bodies are connected to the opposite side of the brain. Your left eye is controlled by the right side of your brain (that is if it is connected to your brain at all) Due to a problem with intubation, the front left side of my tongue has been numb since late 2018. I uncovered that myself by reading the surgical notes. I did have an unexplained gray bracelet on my arm which read "narrow passage." None of the nursing staff connected that with my terrible sore throat.
Try to stay away from the hospitals!!! For your own safety or have someone by your side constantly.
What did you expect to find on the wall of a MedStar Georgetown University Hospital room ? Well, at least it was an inspirational figure of a nice Jewish boy.
With that first sentence I thought we were on our way to some sort of Van Gogh-related contest, so I'm chagrined to find out it's nothing that silly. Sounds as if you've been through the wringer. Hoping you can squeeze yourself out soon and get back to normal. The good news is that your brain sure hasn't taken a hit -- your writing is just as entertaining as ever. I'm glad you had a Jesus action figure keeping you company.
Your Jesus is fab, I'm assuming you were in some Jesuit place. I cannot believe all the side effects you got [that I didn't]. Hoping all that resolves soon, perfectly annoying not to be able to control one's sneer.
Actually, this being a place for tasteless things, my dad, when he was over 60, always married to my mom, similar age, had an infection and lost a testicle. He said the only good part was that he could ask the nurse to twittle it a little whenever she changed the dressing.
Of course there’s Rodney Dangerfield: “If I’m dying, doc, I want a second opinion.” “Ok, you’re ugly too!” And “Doc, I just swallowed a whole bottle of sleeping pills.” “Well, why don’t you have a couple of drinks and get some rest!”
Actually my wife experienced Bell’s Palsy nerve sensation loss in her face, and it’s rapid return using acupuncture. Good luck and glad to have you back.
A man comes into a doctor's office and yells, "My dick! My dick! Something's wrong with my dick!" The receptionist says, "Sir, this is a family practice. Please do not shout out such indelicate things. To get my attention, you might say, 'Nurse, something's wrong with my ear.' We could go from there."
Glad your gray matter is working and the yucky matter has been removed. A quick and complete recovery. Well, you might want to keep the snarl. I’ll bet you wear it well.
Good pun. You’ll be fine. Be nice to Rachel.
Herself says, “Ach! That’s disgusting. I don’t need to hear that shite. But he’s still in the hospital? Sure I’ll say a prayer for the poor man tonight.”
Gene, I just love you. This sounds like something that would happen to me. I have been to lots of hospitals in the area for lots of reasons. Keep sharing your thoughts and symptoms!
I have that pogo-stick blood pressure perpetually due to a condition called autonomic dysreflexia as a result of a spinal cord issue. I wonder if nerve damage like you have suffered can have a similar effect? You can't "feel" the pain in your 👂in a normal way anymore so your body is "telling" you it hurts in a different way?
Also, that pooping thing you speak of. I was in the hospital only 2 days (Monday 12th & Tuesday 13th) but didn't poop until the following Sunday (the day of your surgery, the 18th?) when home health gave me a good old-fashioned soap suds enema. anesthesia slows EVERYTHING down in your system, so this is a common thing following surgeries. Most hospitals won't let you leave following in-patient surgery until you fart.
Tuesday!!
I am saving this one. You are an inspiration and I should I endure such an adventure I can only hope to do it with humor. Speedy recovery.
Oh, I forgot the bigger mistake you might want to look for in your hospital notes; a mistake, or not, written, about your behavior. I was told to prepare to go to rehab for 2 weeks. I was planning, without pleasure, to be away from my home 2 1/2 hours away. Bags pack with a bit of "spirits" for my confinement. Could be I was confused with another patient who couldn't walk the halls unassisted the day after surgery. Next day, too my delight but a bit confused, I was discharged and was home the day before Thanksgiving. I was very pleased, and at my first stop purchased throat lozenges since no one in the hospital paid any attention to my complaint. *see the next note. Much to my dismay even though not complaining about anything, the hospital nurse's note read, "Difficult patient who didn't want to go home." Maybe I should be pleased that it wasn't a more serious mistake like in my medicine dosage. Besides who would believe that someone would not want to leave that crazy place!?
The first clue, had you not been under the influence at the time, was when they wheeled you into the "Jeffrey Dahmer Surgical Suite." Great comedians those Jesuits.
The sides of our bodies are connected to the opposite side of the brain. Your left eye is controlled by the right side of your brain (that is if it is connected to your brain at all) Due to a problem with intubation, the front left side of my tongue has been numb since late 2018. I uncovered that myself by reading the surgical notes. I did have an unexplained gray bracelet on my arm which read "narrow passage." None of the nursing staff connected that with my terrible sore throat.
Try to stay away from the hospitals!!! For your own safety or have someone by your side constantly.
What did you expect to find on the wall of a MedStar Georgetown University Hospital room ? Well, at least it was an inspirational figure of a nice Jewish boy.
With that first sentence I thought we were on our way to some sort of Van Gogh-related contest, so I'm chagrined to find out it's nothing that silly. Sounds as if you've been through the wringer. Hoping you can squeeze yourself out soon and get back to normal. The good news is that your brain sure hasn't taken a hit -- your writing is just as entertaining as ever. I'm glad you had a Jesus action figure keeping you company.
Your Jesus is fab, I'm assuming you were in some Jesuit place. I cannot believe all the side effects you got [that I didn't]. Hoping all that resolves soon, perfectly annoying not to be able to control one's sneer.
Actually, this being a place for tasteless things, my dad, when he was over 60, always married to my mom, similar age, had an infection and lost a testicle. He said the only good part was that he could ask the nurse to twittle it a little whenever she changed the dressing.
Of course there’s Rodney Dangerfield: “If I’m dying, doc, I want a second opinion.” “Ok, you’re ugly too!” And “Doc, I just swallowed a whole bottle of sleeping pills.” “Well, why don’t you have a couple of drinks and get some rest!”
Actually my wife experienced Bell’s Palsy nerve sensation loss in her face, and it’s rapid return using acupuncture. Good luck and glad to have you back.
A man comes into a doctor's office and yells, "My dick! My dick! Something's wrong with my dick!" The receptionist says, "Sir, this is a family practice. Please do not shout out such indelicate things. To get my attention, you might say, 'Nurse, something's wrong with my ear.' We could go from there."
"Okay. Nurse something's wrong with my ear."
"And what would that be, sir?"
"I can't pee through it."
Best wishes, pal. Do what they tell you!
Glad your gray matter is working and the yucky matter has been removed. A quick and complete recovery. Well, you might want to keep the snarl. I’ll bet you wear it well.
Good pun. You’ll be fine. Be nice to Rachel.
Herself says, “Ach! That’s disgusting. I don’t need to hear that shite. But he’s still in the hospital? Sure I’ll say a prayer for the poor man tonight.”
Stop stinking!
Kathleen