I was once the subject (a quid?) of a bribery attempt after I got in trouble with the law for hitting a lamppost with my dad’s ‘69 Firebird. The car lacked power steering and I was just learning to drive, so I misjudged. No injuries, although the lamp bulb shattered. A local judge told my dad, an unbelievably straight-laced dad who happened to also be a journalist, that he could “make the whole thing go away” if my dad made sure certain allegations of corruption would not be the subject of any news stories. My dad of course refused, and later testified against the judge to help get his sorry derrière ousted. Sadly, the whole thing did not go away for me, and I had to pay $100 for a new bulb and also write an essay about the importance of yielding right-of-way to stationary objects, or something.
The Firebird came out of it with minimal damage. I mean, he wasn’t happy about it, but no major punishment was meted out other than a day or two of the silent treatment (I’ve never heard my dad yell, but the silence was probably worse.)
My Dad was much the same … except when I was 13 or so and for some reason blurted out “go to hell” to my mother. He was in his 50s and I didn’t think he could move so fast. As I was scrambling the stairs for my room I could feel him whacking me on the butt, saying, “You. Will. Never. Say that to your mother. Again!” Only time he ever hit me. I deserved it.
The shout of "copy!" no longer rings out in the remaining newsrooms. And certainly the quaint phrase of "dog's cock" for the exclamation mark at the end of a headline is no more to be heard.
Nope. As a former co-worker said to me “you’re normal”. It was meant as an insult. I was raised by a terror inducing father. I was never hit, spanked, or slapped. I also spent twelve years in Catholic school. I’ve always been terrified of ever being caught doing something wrong.
Ayn Rand, a favorite philosopher of libertarians and the far right (SEN Rand Paul was named for her), but whose real name was Alisa Rosenbaum, born a Jew in St. Petersburg, Russia, once wrote, "There’s no way to rule innocent men. The only power any government has is the power to crack down on criminals. Well, when there aren’t enough criminals, one makes them. One declares so many things to be a crime that it becomes impossible for me to live without breaking laws. Who wants a nation of law-abiding citizens? What’s there in that for anyone? But just pass the kind of laws that can neither be observed or enforced nor objectively interpreted - and you create a nation of law-breakers - and then you cash in on guilt." It is easy to blackmail people when the law is no longer something written in a 250-year-old piece of paper and is, instead, the daily whim of the people in power. It worked well for the Soviets, and it works well now for the Hegsethians.
I said maybe to both. I submitted the blackmail to the orange button. As for bribery, I guess I thought small: for a price (a big one) would I bring out a certain donated object at a certain time so a certain person could buy it as the thrift store where I volunteer? Yes. And then I would feel guilty enough that I would donate the bribe to the thrift store too.
But: at my current work as a (very minor) election official, or my previous work doing an esoteric kind of government contracting, absolutely not. And some very charming contractors tried in very minor ways to get me on their good sides. I smiled and let myself be charmed by one and all and sundry, equally, and followed the law absolutely.
This brings me back to when I was teaching at Georgetown as an adjunct professor in the Security Studies Program. An Asian graduate student came to my house (still not sure how he got my address) and rang the bell. When I opened the door he handed me his final paper and with it a bottle of Chivas Regal. I took the paper but told him I couldn’t accept the bottle on principle. I thanked him for his consideration and I closed the door. Later when leaving I noticed the bottle on the front step with a note thanking me for the course (Emerging Technologies and Security) saying something like how much he needed at least a B or he’d be sent back to his country. Well, let’s say his paper wasn’t good at all and I gave a mercy C (not good in grad school). So, yes I was bribed. No I didn’t accept it — or at least act on it. Ten years or more later I still may have the Chivas — unopened. I really don’t like it. I have no idea what happened to the student.
I was a victim of bribery. Back in the 80s I was trying to sell a small house in New Jersey. I was living in Virginia at the time. So conducting business was difficult. I had a buyer, and was told some minor thing had to be repaired. Or for $100 the official in NJ could “overlook the problem”. It pissed me off, but I paid, the house got sold.
I paid bribed a cop in the Yucatan. He pulled me over for speeding -- I wasn't -- and said he would have to bring me to the stationhouse for me to pay my fine. there was a long pause, and then I said, es posible que yo pago a usted, ahora? He agreed this was a swell idea. I gave him $50, American, which was huge at the time. He sent me on my way.
That same thing happened to us in Tecate just as we were nearing the border crossing. A motorcycle cop pulled us over and said that our friend who was driving “ran a stop sign”. Iur friend protested initially but realized it was hopeless. The cop had us follow him to the conveniently nearby police station and said something like — it would be faster if he paid the “fine” outside to him. My friend Klaus said “ I only have $200 and the cop said, “That will be enough…” and off we went. They should just put out a basket that says pay $200 here to get out of Mexico.
I answered “no” to both. I’ve been sober in AA for 3 decades and a lot of people know my history. So if a Chinese agent comes to me and says “give me your secrets or I’ll tell your friends and family you used to be a crack dealer”, well, they already know. And bout various other skeletons in, well, not my closet, but right out in the hall. As far as non criminal peccadilloes, I’m pretty vanilla. The straightest white guy that ever straightened while guying.
Bribery? Nah. While I don’t have “f.u.” money, I have enough of it and no debt other than a mortgage. I get paid lots of money too.
Having non-disclosed information and knowing it isn't secret in some other plane of life haunts me. Not for shaming or judging but knowing a fundamental truth withheld purposely. Not mine to reveal, but sadly mine to keep
I know the author of a book which he published under a pseudonym. He was planning a reveal on the fiftieth anniversary of publication, but did not make it. Nothing earthshaking, but it would have been nice for him to get his accolades. As you put so well, Not mine to reveal, but sadly mine to keep....
The problem, especially these days, is that you don't have to do anything wrong to be blackmailed anymore. AI makes it easy to create "evidence." Once a juicy story gets out, it's impossible to stop. With a little creativity, any little event can be blown into a scandal. lThat's why I put "maybe?" as my poll answer.
I was once the subject (a quid?) of a bribery attempt after I got in trouble with the law for hitting a lamppost with my dad’s ‘69 Firebird. The car lacked power steering and I was just learning to drive, so I misjudged. No injuries, although the lamp bulb shattered. A local judge told my dad, an unbelievably straight-laced dad who happened to also be a journalist, that he could “make the whole thing go away” if my dad made sure certain allegations of corruption would not be the subject of any news stories. My dad of course refused, and later testified against the judge to help get his sorry derrière ousted. Sadly, the whole thing did not go away for me, and I had to pay $100 for a new bulb and also write an essay about the importance of yielding right-of-way to stationary objects, or something.
The Firebird came out of it with minimal damage. I mean, he wasn’t happy about it, but no major punishment was meted out other than a day or two of the silent treatment (I’ve never heard my dad yell, but the silence was probably worse.)
My Dad was much the same … except when I was 13 or so and for some reason blurted out “go to hell” to my mother. He was in his 50s and I didn’t think he could move so fast. As I was scrambling the stairs for my room I could feel him whacking me on the butt, saying, “You. Will. Never. Say that to your mother. Again!” Only time he ever hit me. I deserved it.
You should have submittted this, it's good.
Them
Damn
Lampposts!
Good for your dad! What did he do to you for injuring his Firebird?
The title of your article made me think that it would be very interesting if, for example, SNL were to play Trump as Marlon Brando’s Godfather…..
I don't see Trump as Vito Corleone. Don Corleone had integrity, at least within his own frame of reference.
Trump is more Philip Tattaglia--not too smart, and easily manipulated to be the pawn of Barzini (read Miller and Thiel).
Trump is a pimp.
I thought it was going to be a story from Gene's brother, who often posts here. :)
Same here. And that would have meant something bad had befallen Gene.
I was worried too. Aren’t wr scaredy cats? At least I hope that’s all we are.
Marlon Brando's Godfather would look like a Boy Scout compared to Donvict.
Very happy to see you refer to "spiking" a story. I wonder if they still use that in newsrooms. I still occasionally end my 5 a.m. Stories with -30-
I also vaguely remember Endit.
The shout of "copy!" no longer rings out in the remaining newsrooms. And certainly the quaint phrase of "dog's cock" for the exclamation mark at the end of a headline is no more to be heard.
Dog's cock is new to me, but then I don't remember using a lot of exclamation marks in headlines. Must have just been in the tabloids....
Gene,
You didn't ask if any of us have ever blackmailed anybody!
Could be some good stories . . .
Oooh…. I won’t answer on the grounds….
Nope. As a former co-worker said to me “you’re normal”. It was meant as an insult. I was raised by a terror inducing father. I was never hit, spanked, or slapped. I also spent twelve years in Catholic school. I’ve always been terrified of ever being caught doing something wrong.
I can relate. Parents were okay, but with 12 years of Catholic school, nuns and priests were to be feared. Not to mention my conscience.
Ayn Rand, a favorite philosopher of libertarians and the far right (SEN Rand Paul was named for her), but whose real name was Alisa Rosenbaum, born a Jew in St. Petersburg, Russia, once wrote, "There’s no way to rule innocent men. The only power any government has is the power to crack down on criminals. Well, when there aren’t enough criminals, one makes them. One declares so many things to be a crime that it becomes impossible for me to live without breaking laws. Who wants a nation of law-abiding citizens? What’s there in that for anyone? But just pass the kind of laws that can neither be observed or enforced nor objectively interpreted - and you create a nation of law-breakers - and then you cash in on guilt." It is easy to blackmail people when the law is no longer something written in a 250-year-old piece of paper and is, instead, the daily whim of the people in power. It worked well for the Soviets, and it works well now for the Hegsethians.
And the Trumphukians!!
Stopping quickly to absolutely love this little piece of delight on a shit day - " . . . like Mussolini was a railroad conductor."
I said maybe to both. I submitted the blackmail to the orange button. As for bribery, I guess I thought small: for a price (a big one) would I bring out a certain donated object at a certain time so a certain person could buy it as the thrift store where I volunteer? Yes. And then I would feel guilty enough that I would donate the bribe to the thrift store too.
But: at my current work as a (very minor) election official, or my previous work doing an esoteric kind of government contracting, absolutely not. And some very charming contractors tried in very minor ways to get me on their good sides. I smiled and let myself be charmed by one and all and sundry, equally, and followed the law absolutely.
These sociopaths have no shame, and suffer no consequences, for their own behavior, and view ethical people as suckers and losers.
This brings me back to when I was teaching at Georgetown as an adjunct professor in the Security Studies Program. An Asian graduate student came to my house (still not sure how he got my address) and rang the bell. When I opened the door he handed me his final paper and with it a bottle of Chivas Regal. I took the paper but told him I couldn’t accept the bottle on principle. I thanked him for his consideration and I closed the door. Later when leaving I noticed the bottle on the front step with a note thanking me for the course (Emerging Technologies and Security) saying something like how much he needed at least a B or he’d be sent back to his country. Well, let’s say his paper wasn’t good at all and I gave a mercy C (not good in grad school). So, yes I was bribed. No I didn’t accept it — or at least act on it. Ten years or more later I still may have the Chivas — unopened. I really don’t like it. I have no idea what happened to the student.
Hiya fella Hoya, and teachers must face this on occasion, for sure. Good on ya.
I was a victim of bribery. Back in the 80s I was trying to sell a small house in New Jersey. I was living in Virginia at the time. So conducting business was difficult. I had a buyer, and was told some minor thing had to be repaired. Or for $100 the official in NJ could “overlook the problem”. It pissed me off, but I paid, the house got sold.
I paid bribed a cop in the Yucatan. He pulled me over for speeding -- I wasn't -- and said he would have to bring me to the stationhouse for me to pay my fine. there was a long pause, and then I said, es posible que yo pago a usted, ahora? He agreed this was a swell idea. I gave him $50, American, which was huge at the time. He sent me on my way.
That same thing happened to us in Tecate just as we were nearing the border crossing. A motorcycle cop pulled us over and said that our friend who was driving “ran a stop sign”. Iur friend protested initially but realized it was hopeless. The cop had us follow him to the conveniently nearby police station and said something like — it would be faster if he paid the “fine” outside to him. My friend Klaus said “ I only have $200 and the cop said, “That will be enough…” and off we went. They should just put out a basket that says pay $200 here to get out of Mexico.
I answered “no” to both. I’ve been sober in AA for 3 decades and a lot of people know my history. So if a Chinese agent comes to me and says “give me your secrets or I’ll tell your friends and family you used to be a crack dealer”, well, they already know. And bout various other skeletons in, well, not my closet, but right out in the hall. As far as non criminal peccadilloes, I’m pretty vanilla. The straightest white guy that ever straightened while guying.
Bribery? Nah. While I don’t have “f.u.” money, I have enough of it and no debt other than a mortgage. I get paid lots of money too.
Having non-disclosed information and knowing it isn't secret in some other plane of life haunts me. Not for shaming or judging but knowing a fundamental truth withheld purposely. Not mine to reveal, but sadly mine to keep
I know the author of a book which he published under a pseudonym. He was planning a reveal on the fiftieth anniversary of publication, but did not make it. Nothing earthshaking, but it would have been nice for him to get his accolades. As you put so well, Not mine to reveal, but sadly mine to keep....
So what’s next? A severed horse head in our bed! It’s like the Mafia’s Junior Varsity is running our country. Sickening.
Question: If you don't enjoy the sex is it still considered a bribe?
Hmm. From a certain perspective, is a loaded question a form of blackmail?
The problem, especially these days, is that you don't have to do anything wrong to be blackmailed anymore. AI makes it easy to create "evidence." Once a juicy story gets out, it's impossible to stop. With a little creativity, any little event can be blown into a scandal. lThat's why I put "maybe?" as my poll answer.