18 Comments
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BigDaddy52's avatar

Kudos to all the entrants. Word play like this truly brightens my day.

Hvvfagn's avatar

Agreed. It's a good thing I work from home, because the results had me literally laughing out loud.

Terri Smith's avatar

It is definitely a Frankovich kind of contest and I really liked Burnie-Ayr-Rheola Scratchy Shirt Store and

The Crackenback-Clearview Professional Association of Plumbers

Lizbet's avatar

I feel that Ure-Mama-So SHOULD ACTUALLY BE the name of a comedy festival.

Jon Ketzner's avatar

“Juuudy, Juuudy, Juuudy”…literally

Gregory Dunn's avatar

Her entries were all great but I especially liked the mounting expedition.

Judy Freed's avatar

So glad you enjoyed that one, Gregory!

Kate King's avatar

Hellyer-Dareel-Orange-Athol was the one that really made me guffaw (after I decoded it).

Kitchen Cynic's avatar

Judy Freed rocks.

Dale of Green Gables's avatar

Torn from today's front page:

"U.S. intelligence says Iran can outlast Trump’s Hormuz blockade for months" (former WaPo)

(1) "We don't need no stinkin' intelligence!"

(2) "How many two weeks is that?"

(3) "Okay, we'll just have to keep obliterating them!"

"A deep rift with Pope Leo on Iran prompts high-level White House repair effort" (former WaPo)

(1) "Don't forget the Florsheims Marco and throw in a couple pairs of gold sneakers..maybe a few bibles too."

(2) "Tell him I'll name my next child after him. Melania would like a Pope in the family to go with the Barron. I'm sure her Secret Service guy won't mind."

(3) "Got pallets of water he can use."

Pat Myers's avatar

If you're going to do the contest, please do it on the entry form, not here.

Dale of Green Gables's avatar

Like the contest, but not the contest. Think of it as a pre-Invite. Wouldn't dare enter these. On the other hand would accept out-of-competition ink like the acknowledgement the Cannes Film Festival sometimes gives to films not screened as Official Selections. And besides from a humanism standpoint, any system that requires losers to function is ethically fraught and results in anxiety, shame, and identity collapse. In short, competition is structurally indifferent to suffering. So toy with your subjects as is your divine right, but remember behind those quivering lips and twitching eyelids are damaged human beings.

Gary E Masters's avatar

And our secret agent "fast ball" says they are about to fold and surrender.

Dale of Green Gables's avatar

"What's in a name?" Indeed. Quite a lot, as might be imagined --- with Australia actively changing place names that are racist or derogatory --- but fortunately for the Invitational --- not the silly, rude, or delightfully odd ones. So, safe for now are: Mount Buggery; Boobs Flat; Eggs and Bacon Bay and Nowhere Else. Things, as also might be imagined, are not quite as straightforward (and rational) in these United States thanks to the usual tensions between federal vs. state vs. local authority, political polarization, the also usual disagreement about what is and isn't considered harmful, and along the same lines, local identity vs. national reckoning. In a large nutshell, the tension isn’t about whether outright slurs should go — most people agree on that. It’s about authority, identity, and whose version of history gets to stay on the map.

Gary Blankenship's avatar

Your bumper sticker prize for the next invitational belongs on the White House gates.

John E Simpson's avatar

Meanwhile, I've been trying to come up with a sticker or other totem to put there -- along the lines of the upside-down pineapple, but connoting something like "Malevolent Weenie Herein."

Gary E Masters's avatar

And I wondered if places that discourage the pineapple picture will allow apples. And we get to "full circle time."

Lynne Larkin's avatar

While the "Judy-Jesse-Judy-Jesse" lists are always so great, I loved

The Greta-Gar-Bo Isolation Chamber (Gary Crockett)