My dog just saw me squinting at the cartoon and gave me his WTF look. I told him I was looking for a dick and balls. Then he gave me his “Welcome to my world “ look,
Staying with "Seinfeld" (and genitalia...) there's the classic "Mulva." Jerry is dating a woman who tells him her name rhymes with a part of the female anatomy, but he never learns her actual name. George, in his inimitable fashion, suggests, "Mulva." (It was Dolores).
Of course, "THAT’s not a dick and balls.” It's a picture of them. It's also not an original point, because in 1929 René Magritte did a painting of a pipe, titled, "Ceci n'est pas une pipe" (This is not a pipe).
M. Staake was just following in the long tradition of hiding genitalia in plain sight in cartoons and especially animated films. Lady parts, while not a favorite "Easter egg," do show up from time to time. For example, in "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?"Jessica Rabbit’s crotch gets a brief exposure after she and Bob Hoskins are thrown from a cab during a car accident. Someone removed her underwear for a few short frames, leaving her completely bare.
1) I still don’t get the pizza riddle. Looks to me like you did NOT have “no pizza” left on your pan, because the crusts are part of the pizza. Also, what made you conclude that you each had eaten the same amounts of pizza? I guess if I could answer these myself, I would have long ago cracked the “First Ink” barrier, and become more like the highly talented Judy, of Deerfield Beach, Florida, who wins at least honorable mention almost every week.
2) Your editor was right, because it would take a microscope to find it. I still haven’t. How did Bob Staake know back in 1993 that a certain future imPOTUS would have small, um, hands? Could you reprint the cartoon with the offending, microscopic organ extended with a sharpie? If you can’t find the organ again, I’m sure that #47 would be happy to exercise his sharpie to prove to the readership that his is as consequential as his beautiful tariffs.
Oh my god twinsies. I too inadvertantly ran a cartoon of a penis in a newspaper and didn't get fired.
This penis, however, was very noticeable. It was in a highlight in our entertainment calendar, notifying readers of a GWAR show. I decided I was tired of running the same handout art for the same band and asked the music writer for another image. Whether he was kidding around or didn't see it either, I don't know, and I would never ask at this point. The image was a drawing and it included a woman impaled on a spike, which I noticed immediately and wasn't thrilled with. I showed it to a few other editors who all said the same thing: "It's GWAR." I ran it, and the next morning, sipping coffee at my desk, got a call from my friend Kellye asking me if I was responsible. For what? I asked. OH.
It's HUGE.
If I hadn't done my tour of the newsroom trying to gin up outrage about the impaled lady, I probably would have been fired on the spot. Instead, the grandboss only said that if I kept laughing he'd have to fire me.
I'm not linking to it because I don't want to accidentally sexually assault anyone's eyeballs, but if you google some obvious search terms, you can find the image.
Okay, you cannot leave it like this, Elizardbeth. I will email you privately, so you have my email, and then send me back the art. EYE, and not you, will decide whether we can share it with the offendable.
I'm guessing you and Rachel had eaten the same number of pieces of pizza. She had cut hers into smaller pieces. BTW, did you get my email yesterday? Do you ever get emails, or is that email address a dummy?
Hey, Suzanne. Henry is right, below. Where did you send the email? If it was all within Substack, I have found that unreliable. Hang on, though, I will check.
That doesn't make sense. The number of pieces into which Rachel cut the half a pizza she ate is irrelevant. Anyway, these comments are not for answers to the pizza question; there's a special link for that, to which I have submitted the correct answer.
I disagree. Gene wrote: "we had each eaten the same amount of pizza." I agree that "amount" and "number" are different things, but I think my answer is at least defensible. But looking at the menu, I see that 12″ round pizzas feed 1–2, while 12″ square pizzas feed 2–3. So perhaps Rachel got a square one (though "diameter" is not a word usually used for squares). The area of the square is not twice that of the circle, however.
I had to hunt all over the place to find it. You didn’t say that it was smaller than Trump’s.
My dog just saw me squinting at the cartoon and gave me his WTF look. I told him I was looking for a dick and balls. Then he gave me his “Welcome to my world “ look,
Why do men think dicks and balls are funny? discuss.
Probably because they look so ridiculous out of context.
Do women think vulvas are funny?
Often in context too—I am with Elaine on Seinfeld, “How do you guys walk round with those things?”
Staying with "Seinfeld" (and genitalia...) there's the classic "Mulva." Jerry is dating a woman who tells him her name rhymes with a part of the female anatomy, but he never learns her actual name. George, in his inimitable fashion, suggests, "Mulva." (It was Dolores).
Clearly I need sleep because it took me 1 second too long to get what it rhymed with
To be fair I don’t think Pat would accept that as good rhyme or meter
no
You and Bob should win a Pulitzer for advancing the boundaries of journalism by at least 4 inches.
ISWYDT
I got the poll answer wrong even though I'm pretty sure I'd heard this story before. <sigh>
I had no choice but to click "Go away," as that was how every conversation I ever had in Weitzel's office ended.
Of course, "THAT’s not a dick and balls.” It's a picture of them. It's also not an original point, because in 1929 René Magritte did a painting of a pipe, titled, "Ceci n'est pas une pipe" (This is not a pipe).
The English would say Mary kept a stiff upper lip.
FINALLY found it. Now I have to explain to my wife what I was intently staring at for the last twenty minutes.
Let me know how that goes for ya.
It was...erm...hard to find.
M. Staake was just following in the long tradition of hiding genitalia in plain sight in cartoons and especially animated films. Lady parts, while not a favorite "Easter egg," do show up from time to time. For example, in "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?"Jessica Rabbit’s crotch gets a brief exposure after she and Bob Hoskins are thrown from a cab during a car accident. Someone removed her underwear for a few short frames, leaving her completely bare.
1) I still don’t get the pizza riddle. Looks to me like you did NOT have “no pizza” left on your pan, because the crusts are part of the pizza. Also, what made you conclude that you each had eaten the same amounts of pizza? I guess if I could answer these myself, I would have long ago cracked the “First Ink” barrier, and become more like the highly talented Judy, of Deerfield Beach, Florida, who wins at least honorable mention almost every week.
2) Your editor was right, because it would take a microscope to find it. I still haven’t. How did Bob Staake know back in 1993 that a certain future imPOTUS would have small, um, hands? Could you reprint the cartoon with the offending, microscopic organ extended with a sharpie? If you can’t find the organ again, I’m sure that #47 would be happy to exercise his sharpie to prove to the readership that his is as consequential as his beautiful tariffs.
How did Bob Staake know back in 1993 that a certain future imPOTUS would have small, um, hands?
This explains how:
https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/history-donald-trump-small-hands-insult/story?id=37395515
Anyone who has listened to the Dude, Where’s My Czar? episode of the You’re Invited podcast should have answered correctly.
Which for some strange reason reminds me of the bawdy "No Balls at All:"
Now listen my children, a story you'll hear.
A song I will sing you; 'twill fill you with cheer.
A charming young maiden was wed in the Fall.
She married a man who had no balls at all.
cho: No balls at all. No balls at all.
She married a man who had no balls at all.
For those inclined, I'll let you find the rest of the lyric on your own.
Almost as good as "Hitler has only got one ball; Goebbels has two but really small...." Sung to the tune of "Colonel Bogey".
It took me a while to find it but dammit...did you have to make it life sized???????
Oh my god twinsies. I too inadvertantly ran a cartoon of a penis in a newspaper and didn't get fired.
This penis, however, was very noticeable. It was in a highlight in our entertainment calendar, notifying readers of a GWAR show. I decided I was tired of running the same handout art for the same band and asked the music writer for another image. Whether he was kidding around or didn't see it either, I don't know, and I would never ask at this point. The image was a drawing and it included a woman impaled on a spike, which I noticed immediately and wasn't thrilled with. I showed it to a few other editors who all said the same thing: "It's GWAR." I ran it, and the next morning, sipping coffee at my desk, got a call from my friend Kellye asking me if I was responsible. For what? I asked. OH.
It's HUGE.
If I hadn't done my tour of the newsroom trying to gin up outrage about the impaled lady, I probably would have been fired on the spot. Instead, the grandboss only said that if I kept laughing he'd have to fire me.
I'm not linking to it because I don't want to accidentally sexually assault anyone's eyeballs, but if you google some obvious search terms, you can find the image.
Okay, you cannot leave it like this, Elizardbeth. I will email you privately, so you have my email, and then send me back the art. EYE, and not you, will decide whether we can share it with the offendable.
Okie dokie, I sent it. If you need more receipts, I think Kellye is actually a subscriber here, but I don't know how to tag her!
I'm guessing you and Rachel had eaten the same number of pieces of pizza. She had cut hers into smaller pieces. BTW, did you get my email yesterday? Do you ever get emails, or is that email address a dummy?
Hey, Suzanne. Henry is right, below. Where did you send the email? If it was all within Substack, I have found that unreliable. Hang on, though, I will check.
I sent you an email. To your email address.
Thanks. Got it!
I did start to use the orange button, but a comment was easier. Call me lazy!
That doesn't make sense. The number of pieces into which Rachel cut the half a pizza she ate is irrelevant. Anyway, these comments are not for answers to the pizza question; there's a special link for that, to which I have submitted the correct answer.
I disagree. Gene wrote: "we had each eaten the same amount of pizza." I agree that "amount" and "number" are different things, but I think my answer is at least defensible. But looking at the menu, I see that 12″ round pizzas feed 1–2, while 12″ square pizzas feed 2–3. So perhaps Rachel got a square one (though "diameter" is not a word usually used for squares). The area of the square is not twice that of the circle, however.